The Language of Touch
Our bodies have a tremendous capacity to experience pleasure through our senses: taste, sight, sound, smell, and touch. Heightening the senses to the point of exquisite joy is a playful art. Massage is a means in which we can easily connect with the realm of eroticism, and where we can relax and explore each other intimately.
Touch is said to be the food for our souls and is a tactile experience that is vital for health, happiness and overall well-being. A large part of our brains are given over to this sensory department and it is the primary sense we develop. Interestingly enough, touch is the first sense an embryo experiences in the womb as it strokes its finger or thumb across its skin. For a newborn, touch is the first point of contact with its mother and the world at large.
We establish healthy self-esteem and appreciation for our own bodies through being touched in a loving way and we develop these attitudes early in our lives. By having these healthy attitudes towards ourselves, we can create happy and fulfilling sexual relationships.
The yearning to be touched remains with us, especially as adults and promiscuity is often a search for being touched in a nurturing way. Unfortunately, the pleasuring of one another through loving touch and massage is greatly neglected and our bodies subtle sense’s ignored.
In western culture, aural sensations and aggressive visual sex dominate, and the more dulled the delicate levels of sensual receptivity become. It’s sad that in particular touch of the human body for pleasure is morally condemned and regulated by culture, religion, society and government. Even within sexual relationships, exploration of the senses through the language of touch is censored by prevailing attitudes held by both partners and sex generally becomes purely a genital experience with orgasm and ejaculation being the primary goal in mind.
By learning the language of touch through the art and skills of massage we can discover the delights of full body sensuality and set the whole body alight with exquisite pleasure. All of our body’s senses, in particular our skin responses, bond our outer realities together to our inner experiences – i.e. what we feel. Touch, skin and our feelings are quite literally inseparable from each other, and to have our skin touched and caressed in a sensual, tender and nurturing way brings a deeper level of being to what it means to be human.
The Strokes of Sensual Massage
Make the mood of massage sensuous by keeping your stokes flowing and soft. Use the flat of your hands to slither and slide, and caress your lover’s body. Even during sensual massage you can use more invigorating massage techniques like kneading as long as you blend the strokes harmoniously together.
Play between your movements and allow your motions to merge into one another as of you were playing a symphony on your lover’s body. Do remember to let your stokes be fluid, never jerky, and always take your strokes around or outwards of the body rather than abruptly stopping in mid-flow.
Begin your sensual massage with an area of your lover’s body using softer strokes that will relax your partner physically as well as psychologically. This will also warm up and stretch their body’s soft tissue.
Sensual Massage incorporates different stroke techniques that will soothe and arouse your lover. The fan stroke can be used all over their body and may vary in size and strength depending on the particular effect that you are wishing to achieve. Small fan strokes applied with some measure of pressure that are moving up the body will stretch tissue and release muscle tension as well as boost blood circulation. Using softer, larger fan strokes will give a more euphoric effect. Flowing fan strokes should slide steadily and at an even pressure over the skin using the full surface of the hands and they should be sufficiently soft to mold and melt into the contours of the body. When enlarging your strokes to encompass larger areas of the body.
Circle strokes are excellent for stretching and soothing the soft tissue of the body. You can use them on the front, back and sides of your lover’s body. In the movement of the circle stroke, only your left hand makes a complete circle, whereas your right hand only makes a half-circle. Use these circles to stroke over your lover’s skin in constant and flowing movements.
This is where your hands skate over your lover’s body. This stroke can spread apart and cover areas of the body like the legs and the back at the same time, then slide together so it feels like there are many hands lovingly stroking your lover. This technique is guaranteed to have your lover surrendering him/herself to the all-encompassing sensations of your touch. By varying the pressure of your hands by being firmer as they spread apart and lighter as they glide together is sure to make your lover putty in your hands. Stretch strokes are great for bringing a feeling of length and expansion. They relieve tension as you stretch the muscles outwards.
The racking touch is brilliant to use after a massage sequence to stimulate your lover’s nerve endings that are close to the skin’s surface. This brings out a sense of tension release from the body. Slightly claw-shape your hands and use the pads of your fingers to rake over the skin in short and overlapping movements. One hand follows the other in a consistent downward motion. Rake from the top of a limb or body area to the bottom.
This is the lightest of touches and moves down the body in the same manner as the raking touch. It is especially sensual and can send thrilling shivers through your lover’s entire body.
How to Prepare for Giving a Sensual Massage
Allow time away from everyday distractions for both you and your lover. Dedicate yourselves totally to each other during this special time together. Turn off the phone, place a do not disturb sign on the door if you must, and create a sensual space before you begin. Soft, sensual lighting such as candles are perfect for the occasion and so is quite music playing in the background.
Ensure that the room in which you are giving your lover the sensual massage is draft free and warm. And have your aromatic massage oil and other necessities are close at hand.
Always make certain that you and your lover will be comfortable during the massage. You can position yourselves on the bed or on a mattress on the floor with plenty of plump cushions.
Applying the Oil
Use a little oil in order to lubricate your lover’s skin, giving your strokes a sensuous feel to them. You can prepare your own oil blend before hand or buy an all ready prepared massage oil. Look for oils that are of good quality and are chemical free.
Pour a small quantity of massage oil into a bowl with a tea light under it to keep it warm and easily accessible. Dip your fingers into the oil bowl and then gently rub your hands together before spreading it onto your lover’s skin. Apply just enough oil to allow a smooth glide of your hands.
Sensual Massage As a Medium of Love
Through the giving and receiving of sensual massage, you and your lover will discover how to explore and express loving touch that’ll enable you both to penetrate psychological and physical barriers of the body and mind to bring you into closer association between touch, skin and feelings.
When we invite our lover to feel the luxurious quality of the silken texture and the warm and vulnerable feelings that are evoked from the intimate contact of sensual massage we bring into being an almost transcendental quality to the act of loving one another that has an orgasmic energy all of its own. Correctly practiced, you can begin to view sensual massage as an extension of sex and your lover as a temple to be worshiped.